I’m sure that you’ve heard countless times that over 50% of all marriages end in divorce. This is an overwhelming statistic, and it just goes to show how difficult relationships with the other sex can be.

Each person has a different time table for getting over a divorce, and it’s important not to rush from one bad relationship into another. Before getting ready to date again, it’s wise to make sure that you’ve had a chance to work through your issues before jumping into the next relationship.

You need to be honest with yourself, and ask yourself if you are prepared mentally, physically, and spiritually to commit yourself to finding a new relationship. Some people are ready the moment their previous relationship ends and others can take months or years until they reach that point.

The longer you were married, the more difficult it becomes to find other singles. Married couples tend to develop and foster relationships with other married couples. Once a divorce is finalized, one of the divorced couple tends to lose this base of friends.

Where are the best places to meet other singes? This is an age old question, and there is a variety of old stand bys: the local bar or pub, night clubs, social clubs, and church to name a few. Many singles rely on friends or people they already know to help them find someone (i.e. a blind date or prearranged meeting). Finally many singles cling to the hope of a chance encounter (i.e. bumping into someone while shopping, etc.) leading to finding Mrs. Right.

The internet becomes a great source for meeting other singles. It’s an ever increasing pool with more and more people getting connected to the internet. For seasoned internet veterans, it’s hard to believe that tens of thousands of people use the internet for the first time each and every day, and this trend won’t be ending any time soon.

Where is the best place for these people to find other singles?

I’m sure you’ve read countless stories about free social networking sites like Facebook and MySpace. These sites are great for keeping in touch with people that you already are familiar with, but finding quality singles is not something these sites are renowned for.

For older singles, these sites also seem quite intimidating to use. They tend to be oriented towards younger web surfers, with the majority of users under the age of 35.

Online dating sites provide a great service for divorced men and women. They provide a large pool of qualified singles that are also looking to find someone else.

Technology has gotten to the point where anyone is able to use one of these sites. If you know how to type out an email, then you’re more than qualified to navigate your way through an online dating site.

There are countless sites out there, and the service they offer cover a wide gamut. There are sites for divorced singles, single parents, disabled singles, interracial, ethnic (i.e. Italian, German, Asian, Arab, Indian, Russian, etc.), mail order brides, seniors, gay and lesbian, as well as various sites set up for singles just looking for sexual experiences either online or in person.

Most paid sites will offer a free trial membership so you can get a chance to look around a site and see what it has to offer before making a decision on whether or not to join. See what the pool of singles look like in your local area and take the time to investigate the various options out there.

The world is a really big place, and the task of finding someone can become overwhelming, but online dating sites do a really good job of helping you narrow down your search.

Here’s an interesting story this morning regarding the use of background checks for online dating sites. The article goes into detail about the ongoing debate on whether or not these checks will add any value to a dating service.

Of all the major online dating companies, only True.com currently provides a screening process for it’s customers. This process involves running names through state databases of criminal records. There are arguments about whether or not the screening test is comprehensive or thorough enough, and it may lead True.com members into a false sense of security.

The article is in response to the New Jersey Law passed in January (know as the Internet Dating Safety Act) that requires online dating sites to provide background checks on each of their members. New Jersey remains the only state with the law in effect, with other states such as New York and Pennsylvania looking at similar legislation.

This is just a reminder to use your common sense when dating online. Remember to keep your personal information secure and make sure to follow the same rules of safety you would when dating off line.

For anyone who thinks that online dating is a passing trend, I just bumped into an article that shows its popularity increasing.  The study was based out of Great Britain by the dating agency Parship, and it makes two fantastic claims.

• “Nearly eight million Britons used some form of online dating service in 2007, compared to 5.4 million who used a mixture of offline and online services in 2005.”

• “Over 53 per cent of singles intend to use the internet to meet someone in the future, rising to 65 per cent of 36 to 40 year-olds.”

These statistics are incredible, and it shows that people don’t attach a stigma to using online services.  In fact, these statistics show that your network or pool of available matches is much larger than relying on the traditional method of hoping for a chance encounter.

The increased use of technology is the driving force behind this.  People use email, text messaging and instant messaging while at work.  We log onto the internet to get almost all of our news, and we use the internet to do research when we’re in the market to buy something. People are comfortable using these mediums of communication, and online dating is just another extension of that.

Singles are increasingly aware that using an online dating service will drastically reduce the amount of time it will take to find that someone special.  It gives you the benefit of “meeting” someone online without having to go through the time and expense of a traditional date.

You also are able to “meet” many different singles as well.  You can have ongoing discussions and/or emails with multiple singles at once.  This is not considered “cheating” in online circles.  Once you’ve had a chance to get to know a little bit about a person, you can set about arranging that first face-to-face meeting.

The savings in time is well worth the small investment involved with joining a dating site.  For $15-$25 per month, online dating sites offer real value for singles.  Whether you are a single mother who only has time for herself once the children are in bed or a working professional who is constantly away on business, online dating provides you the perfect platform for meeting that someone special on your own schedule.

To read the original article, click here.

Welcome to section ten of my Online Dating Quick Start Guide.  We’re entering the home stretch.

When you join an online dating site, you need to be aware that your writing skills will play the most important part of how you communicate. Almost all of the early interaction online takes place in the form of written word. You will “write” things out when you send an email or chat online.

Writing about ourselves is often the hardest thing for each of us to do. It’s difficult for most people to sell themselves. People are generally too modest and it’s difficult for them to highlight their personality traits. It’s much easier to talk about others than about ourselves.

Writing your online profile is the first thing that you need to do when you sign up for a dating service. This goes with your picture and it helps other members to get an idea about who you are. There are various articles out there to assist you with this, but I want to focus on what to do once you’ve completed that process.

The next task you need to work on is developing an email approach that you are going to send to profiles that interest you. Take time and pay attention in great detail when you craft this. This is your sales pitch, and you are trying to sell yourself enough so that the person feels inclined to respond to your email.

You are going to create a “template” to use for all of your initial contact emails. What I mean by this is you only need to go through this process once. Take some time and sit down and write a brief introduction about yourself. Focus on keeping it to two paragraphs (one is preferred) which highlight you and your interests. Make it direct and give just enough information that the recipient will want to know just a little bit more.

You are going to continually use this “template” for each email approach you send out, but make sure to take a few minutes to really personalize each email. The last thing you want to do is just send your profile out without personalizing it. The easiest way to do this is to make a reference to something that they mentioned in their profile. If you can incorporate this into your email, your response rate will increase exponentially.

Which email would you be more inclined to respond to?

• Option #1: Hi, I think you look like a nice lady and I’d like to get in touch with you.

• Option #2: I just saw your profile on (name site) and you look like just the type of lady I’d be interested in learning a little more about. You mentioned how you were an outdoor person in your profile, and that’s exactly how I would describe myself. I enjoy………(fill in the rest).

Once you begin browsing at various profiles, start to take some notes and come up with a shortlist of profiles (7-10) that seems to be of interest. Send an email out to each of those profiles.

You don’t want to put all of your eggs in one basket. Remember that the focus of these online dating sites is to get your profile in front of as many people as possible. You are looking to initiate discussions with as many quality singles as you can.

One last thing, don’t get your hopes up too high. You need to anticipate that your email will not illicit a response. Just because you sent an email does not guarantee that you will receive a response. People don’t always respond to their email, and they have many reasons why.

Once you’ve completed this, the next step is to head over to the chat rooms and see what’s going on over there.

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It’s taken a lot of work, but we’ve just added our first slug of online dating site reviews.  There are many more to come, but it takes a lot of time to register with the sites and get a peek at the different options each of these sites has to offer.

We started with the Friend Finder network, which is a family of 18 different niches that cater to specific types of singles.  Friend Finder is one of the original internet dating sites, and they really know what they’re doing.  The network is huge, and it includes all sorts of niche sites, including: ethnic (Asian, Filipino, French, German, Italian, Korean), religious (Christian and Jewish), seniors, gay, lesbian, as well as various sites that are adult in nature and are focused on singles looking for sexual relationships.

Feel free to check out our reviews and visit the various sites.  Sign up is free at each of them, so you really have nothing to lose.

Here’s the second installment of my Online Dating Quick Start Guide, which goes through choosing the right online dating site.

Google “online dating service” and you’ll see that there are over 8 MILLION pages promoting various sites.  As you can see, the possibilities are endless and the task of picking the right site is overwhelming.

Here are 6 tips to use:

1.  What are you hoping to find?

There are thousands of sites, many of which cater to very specific singles.

• Are you looking for friendship, a serious relationship, or are you just looking for a good time?
• Heterosexual or homosexual site?
• Are you looking for someone who is similar to you (i.e. African American, Italian, French, German, Religious, Overweight, Disabled, Single parent, etc.)?  You have to go shopping in the right place to find the thing you’re looking for.

2.  Does the site offer a free trial membership?

All reputable sites will offer you a free trial membership.  This is a great sales tool, because it gives you a chance to see what the site has to offer before you pay any money.  One thing to be aware of, you will have very limited access with a free membership.  You may not be able to preview many profiles, and you won’t be able to instigate communication with other profiles until you upgrade to a paid membership.

3.  What tools/technology does the site offer?

Online dating has come a long way over the past few years, and there are countless tools you can use to communicate with other suitors.  Check to see what tools a site uses to promote this communication.  Some of the most common tools are: email, chat, private chat, instant messaging, audio introductions, web chat, blogs, interactive magazines, and groups.

4.  How secure is your information?

Make sure that the service you are planning to use protects all of your personal information.  Most services offer both email and chat through an internal mailbox.  What that means is the person you are communicating with never has access to your actual email address unless you give it to them.  Another nice feature to look for is the ability to block a specific member from communicating with you.  There’s nothing worse than having a stalker.

5.  How many members in your local area?

This is a very important point to look at.  How many people are interested in starting a relationship with someone who lives 500+ miles away?  It just isn’t convenient to meet them in person.  It’s much easier to meet someone who lives within 40 minutes of your house over a cup of coffee or a quick lunch.

6.  How much does it cost?

As much as we don’t like to admit it, money is always a factor.  To find a quality single, you are going to have to whip out your credit card and pay for a membership.  Paid sites offer one valuable thing, and that’s the fact that their members have a vested interest in being there, and as a result they are serious about looking for others.  Look for a site that gives you the best bang for your dollar.

Once you feel comfortable with the features a site offers, focus your efforts on setting up the best profile you can.  After that’s completed, sit back and enjoy meeting all of the quality singles these sites have to offer.   Enjoy!!

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